For today i got to pour all my feelings out.. I am real pissed yes frustrated and stressed too.. Nobody to confront to.. went home with shumin today.. and share my thoughts with her..feeling better after tat.. at least she understand wad i thinking.. Sigh.. Stressed.. got back my maths test paper.. was real disappointed with my marks.. 29/35.. or yeah no big deal abt it.. ppl might think is high and i think is alright .. yeah if only that was me in Sec1.. pass this years.. i realised i have risen my standard.. if i'm not happy.. that's it! It means the marks doesn't reach my standard.. i kept mum for the rest of a day.. and it's only a period anyway.. studying my own test paper was a disaster.. i was so damn disappointed.. guess wad?! all the marks deducted are careless mistakes!! I couldn't stop but wondering why!? Why?! Why am i so careless?! if i only spend a little time more to check another time of my work i would probably get a higher mark.. But wad done cannot be undone.. i swear i muz get a better result that i am satisfied with the next test.. I kept comparing with ShuTing n Annabel and Suhua too as she suddenly shot up.. i felt real stressed.. i try to stop comparing them with me..but i couldn't... my mind was in a total mess earlier on.. if not for this blog and Shumin.. i think i had already gone crazy.. Yes Shumin is right.. when ur friends get a higher mark den u , u will be kind of unhappy.. yeah i am that kind of person.. i wouldn't mind admiting it.. I was really pissed with myself too.. why the hell am i poor in English?! i wanted to improve it but didn't noe how to.. so pissed.. i felt so lucky to be sitting behind xueting as she's like my dictionary.. but i am a bit embarrassed as i seems to be bothering her asking this and tat.. I have the kind of feeling tat i will fail my chemistry test.. oh well... how i wished to drop that subject.. seriously i do understand wad the teacher is talking abt.. but when i flip through the TB it seems that Chua has not teach some of it.. 3 tests next week.. oh well.. this week end will be a bz week for me.. Writing notes.. memorising and so on.. most probably trying not to watch the tv and online.. Anyway, i won't be online tat often anymore.. dun hab much time to do it.. as it seems meaningless.. juz sitting in front of the com finding stuffs to do after checking up my idols news.. and nth much.. might as well spend the time studying..if stressed juz watch some tv.. it does helps..
Glad that i started studying my chinese early this week... left the meanings of 3 words to memorised.. Oh yeah.. and the sentence forming.. reading through it..
I think i'm going mad soon.. Came back home today, and first thing i tot of is hw .. after eating my lunch i went straight for my hw.. it's been a long time since i does that.. i think i was in kindergarden at that time.. wonder why i'm so "guai" at that time.. i came home and went straight to hw even b4 i eat.. Hiax.. anyway today juz a sucky day for me..
